Stop trying to blame your poor body!
I have no idea why that title popped into my head, but I am inspired to write a blog post about a treatment experience I had at work yesterday.
I think about all the amazing conversations that I have with individuals in closed rooms and the amount of amazing learning that goes on that so many of us could learn from.
Most of my learning came from experimenting on myself and my clients. Talking, exploring new ideas and most of all staying curious.
A client’s back went FULL STOP. In the hospital, on morphine, cannot move. Laid on the floor of his house for 2 days. I got a text, he was desperate so I inserted him into the end of my day.
He walks into the clinic and I say, okay, let’s talk, about what’s going on. What is stressing you out?
He said “Nothing, I just bent over to pick something up and I knew the minute I stood up that I hurt my back, I just knew it was bad”
My reply was, “That is a nice story, and one most therapists would take and run with and then massage the lower back. I won’t accept that though, what is going on”.
“No, no he tells me, I did pick something up and my back seized”
I replied again, ”I understand that is the most comfortable story to tell but that is not the real problem, what is stressing you out”
Meanwhile, I am trying to calm myself down so that I can treat him, his energy is high, and he is stressed out.
This is how I treat my clients, supine, face up looking right at them. Full support, full attention, and full focus. He finally lets go. There is a a massive leak in the roof of his business, he tries to deal with the landlord and he is just constantly blocked by him, unheard and he feels like he has been left looking like a fool. His shop still has water leaking everywhere, ruining his very expensive equipment and now he doesn’t know what to do.
His brain is frustrated, in fear of having to move his entire life up to this point, and he woke up Monday with a seized back. All the decision-making was done, he was in the hospital on drugs and no other decisions could be made because he was dealing with debilitating pain.
We talked through it, and I treated his entire anterior core, where all the stress is gathered. Where the muscle imbalances accumulate and pull and stress out the posterior back muscles. Worked on his jaw and head, finishing with the neck, and he left with a smile.
“If I am feeling anxious I consciously go through this list and figure out which one I need, and which one I have been lacking when my brain figures it out.”
The number one distraction for stress is pain. Period.
This is not a new scenario, I have been here more times than I can count. I have seen it over and over. Dr John E. Sarno taught me in all his books. The number one distraction for stress is pain. Period.
Stop blaming the poor body, and all the diagnoses that people love to label us with; and face the fact that unmanaged stress is a major player in the game. In these situations, of course, I am a therapist and understand the effects of long-term muscle imbalances etc
Does this mean there is no hope? Of course not, but it takes years of getting to know who you are, how your individual body and personality tick, gaining autonomy over your emotions and listening to that inner voice. It takes conscious effort to keep our past and our present stresses at bay. It totally can be done, oh yes.
I have learned to manage my stress, see the markers, and listen to my inner voice. Take breaks in life, and take more breaks when I am busy. My brain runs a mile a minute, I need to give it rest.
We are moving and selling our house. We moved 2 weeks ahead of schedule and the whole deal fell through for the third time and we still don’t have confirmation of a sale.
Does this suck? Yep.
But if I let my brain dwell on the negative it will surely suck worse. While my husband and I moved, we started a Netflix series and every few hours took breaks to sit and cuddle together to relax and remember what’s important.
We dragged a mattress in front of our wood-burning fireplace and slept in the living room. We read our novels, we cooked together. These periods of rest kept my nervous system calm because I understood that I was safe, I had time, and I could handle anything.
I always ask myself, Do I have food? Do I have clothing? Do I have shelter? If these three needs are met, then the rest can fall by the wayside. I do not need anything as a human, beyond these needs.
I will just give you an example of what my brain and body need to stay calm.
I need writing for a few times a week, whether it is journaling, blogging, or writing my book.
This is a non-negotiable, weightlifting three times a week.
I have to walk in nature with my dogs every day.
I need to rest in the afternoon for 10 min if possible on my days off to let my brain catch up on some sleep. I wake up thinking every day around 4;30 and that can be exhausting.
I also need my hot tub at times to be outdoors relaxed and warm, looking up into my tree tops.
I need to cook to relax. It nourishes my soul, brings creativity to my everyday and feeds my family.
This is the mental list I have created for myself. If I am feeling anxious I consciously go through this list and figure out which one I need, and which one I have been lacking when my brain figures it out. I just go and do it. If you do not put the oxygen mask on yourself, you are no good to others!
Your list will look vastly different from mine, and it should, we are all individuals! But they should all include some form of quiet, peaceful reflection, some sort of journaling or writing (a way to listen to ourselves), and some sort of movement.
Our bodies are a whole, it is not just our back or our neck, it is a list of about 50 factors!
Take care of our SELVES…I have to go get my workout clothes on now!
Cheers, Heidi
